Appt #2 and #3 Upper GI and Chest X-Ray

I had my Upper GI done last week, and it was by far the most involved procedure to date.   Prep wasn't so bad.  As I mentioned previously, I went to bed at 7pm the night before and didn't eat or drink anything.  For most people, they would be hungry by morning, but not me.  Like most obese people, we haven't eaten breakfast in god knows how long.  I can go all day without putting a morsel of food in my system, but I am doomed come evening.  It's not like the foods I was putting into my belly were bad foods, but they were in MASS QUANTITIES.  At dinner time, I was a bottomless pit.
I digress! Again, back down to Penn.  This time, had to wait a little longer than usual but everyone was nice as always.  When I registered for my procedure, I asked what to expect.  My co-workers had me thinking that I was going to have a tube put down my throat.  I did that once in college and was none to thrilled about it.  Turns out, it was just a swallow test under X-ray.

I got a brief rundown in the waiting room as to what I would have to do.
First, there are little crystals that you have to toss to the back of your throat and chase with a bit of water.
Then, this thick Barium, then a think Barium (I think).

When I went in for my flouroscopy, I met with a lovely first year student as well as a medical resident and the doctor performing the procedure.  They gave me another run down of what to expect.   Told me the stuff I would drink isn't the best but it will surely pass through.  I'm thinking, liquid...I'll pee it out.  Nope, he quickly corrected me that it will come out the other pipe. Only me!  Oh.... there was a little needle to that slows down your GI tract.  Doc gave me that and while it entered my blood stream he went to put on his radiation gear.  He came back in Camo and the resident has on sparkly green.  Another reason why Penn Medicine has been a stellar decision.

So big ole me gets onto some platform behind an xray and they have me take the crystals.  Think of it like a shot, but this shot was like sour lemon flavored pop rocks which immediately dissolved as I took the itty bitty bit of water to help it go down.  I am told this help expand.  Feels like you have to burp, but you are told that you can't.  Once that went down, I was then asked to drink about 12 ozs of this think white liquid.  Barium, right?  This stuff looks as nasty as it sounds.  So I took a deepbreath and just thought of all the times I hosed guys at the bar doing Irish Car Bombs. 1-2-3 and that think shit was down into my belly.  You can feel every ounce of it go through.

In order for this thick ass "drink" to do it's trick they lay you back and have you roll around to coat you whole stomach.  All while taking pics.  After those series of pictures were taken I then had one final drink...the thinner white stuff.  This time, I had to lay down but drink it through a straw just a sip at a time.  Since I couldn't do my signature chug, it was less than stellar.  The taste on either of them wasn't so bad, didn't have much of one to be honest.  It was just the texture.  Unless is frozen and full of Bailey's, I'm not a fan of thick drinks.

Hopefully, if things go my way, I will have surgery in March and by the time I go to Mexico the end of April, I will be slowly sipping one of those bad boys.