Appt #9 FROM HELL!

I was scared of this test when I was 21 and it hadn't changed at 38.  When I called to make my appointment for my esophageal manometry, the woman on the phone told me I would be under anesthesia.  SHE LIED!  Luckily I had the heads up the day prior from my appointment reminder.

The lucky day was last thursday.  Couldn't eat or drink from midnight the night before.  And with the amount of water I've been consuming lately, that was a struggle! This appointment was at HUP (Hospital at University of Penn).  No disrespect to anyone I know who may work there, but the environment sucks.  I am more than certain my HIPAA rights were violated.  I had no choice but to go to that facility.  Fortunately, my nurse Robin was delightful.

When I got into the room, I told Robin very clearly that I was not happy about the procedure and my blood pressure proved it. I was sky high and worse cause I couldn't take my meds that morning.  She explained to me what the procedure was and that it should take less than 10 minutes.  I settled a little until I turn to my left and saw the elephant sized tube that was going to be inserted up my nose!

So it may not be elephant sized, but that shit is thick!  She gave me some liquid to snort up my nose to help numb the passageway.  Unfortunately, I have never been much of a snorter so it was difficult for me to injest.  After a minute she went to go in my left nostril but had difficulty because there was so much fluid that I hadn't injested.  So she went in the right one. I cannot even describe how uncomfortable it was.  I gagged the entire time and tried to regurgitate it back up. Tears streaming down my face and cheeks red of embarrassment.  Just as I begin to breathe, the computer that is monitoring the test CRASHES!

In what fer like forever for the PC to reboot, Robin allowed me to take a selfie!

See that joy in my face????

Procedure lasted another 15 minutes. Some sipping of water, some deep breathes, and the promise to not breathe in between and the test was done. Pulling that elephant out of my nose was no treat either!

The next two nights my throat hurt like a bitch.  On the plus side, I never breathed better!

Appt #8: Another place to make you feel young

I am quickly learning how unhealthy I truly am by the other patients in waiting rooms having 30 years on me!

Went to the Pulmanologist on Tuesday for a consultation regarding sleep apnea.  A consult we all knew was going to require me a sleep consult but gotta nickle and dime you by having "consults".  This doc is old school.  The charts he had on me from the computer he has to write down in a file.  Defeats the purpose of online charting but you can't teach an old dog new tricks.  He took his time writing down notes that I just happened to snap a pic of him.  #nooneissafeinthepresenceofmyiphone

Lungs are open. Heart is fine. Nasal passages are clear. Sleep patterns assessed. Questions asked and answered.  So the verdict is... I need a sleep study and my insurance doesn't cover it at home. So, I have to spend two consecutive nights at the study clinic.  This sealed my fate that I will not be having this surgery any time soon.  Looks like May is my new target date.  I am okay with it.

I think the biggest thing that I have learned is how truly unhealthy I am.  And all these procedures are going to assist me in the greater scheme.  I just wish I did all of these things sooner.  To think I am going to be able to breathe at night and that my snoring will subside is miraculous.  Do you know the last time I let a gentleman caller spend the night???? That's right, never!

Appt #7: Do you have conversations with anyone that perhaps other people can't see or hear?

Ah, the joys of a couch!  Indeed one of my favorite places of all time. However, when it come to brain shrinking, might not be the best place to be. I kid.  Going to the psychiatrist wasn't so bad.  I had been to therapy before and it was no different. Well...

So this specific appointment is required but not covered by my insurance. I had to pay $275 up front to get Psychiatric clearance.  I have to say, I felt jipped right off the bat.  I was marginally excited about seeing a real psychiatrist for the first time. I was less than thrilled that I was seeing a student intern by the name of Emily Wu.  I am in full support of teaching hospitals and welcome any and all students to learn from my medical charts, but darn it, I wanted the real thing!

I spent my morning filling out a 30 page survey on the history of my obesity.  I had to chart my weight from the age of 5 in five year increments along with full body diagrams.  I had to answer questions about my family and their weight.  I had to reflect on "reasons I could have gained weight" that made me face some things in my past that I didn't really want to reflect on.  Such as, my "break-up" with a dear friend (or two) and my historic two month battle with Chantix. Elissa reviewed all these materials just before meeting with me.  This was very much a clinical appointment.  She continued to ask me questions about me, my life with food, my diet, etc.  She was most concerned for my eating habits and how I can go all day without eating.  I used the word binge eat at night and learned that binging is something completely different and more damaging, especially in psychology. I am an over-eater.  That was easy!

Some of my favorite questions from the session...

Do you eat and find yourself unable to stop yourself?
Do you have guilt or sadness after eating?
Do you have conversations with anyone that perhaps other people can't see or hear? I laughed so hard at this question because she was so serious!

Elissa is a very text book soon-to-be doctor.  She isn't really natural at talking.  She does well, though, at telling you her clinical determinations.  I say that because she has cleared me for surgery.  My mental health is in tact. Thank you Prozac!!!  (I should mention, she seemed concerned I was on Prozac and didn't quite take my word for it in regards to taking 20 mgs daily. She asked for my Primary Doc info to verify. She did make one recommendation that will be on my chart, and that is to speak at length with my nutritionist on eating every two hours, which at this point is my biggest weakness.  I am still overeating at nighttime, just with healthier foods.