Normal triage with nurse. Get on the scale. Sure, no problem! TWO HUNDRED AND NINETY-FOUR POUNDS! 294!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Just a year ago I was 245 and to me that was a victory. I gained everything I lost back and then some. I say this number out loud cause it scared the shit out of me.
Lucky for me, I had "checked in" on Facebook where I was and my best friend noticed and was nearby as asked for a lunch date. Just what I needed! Food. LOL. I kid. I just needed a friend. I wasn't down, I was just scared. Gaining weight before surgery was not an option. I gained 20 lbs in two short months. So at lunch, I ordered my very first turkey burger with NO BUN. The Food Funeral is over. I knew it was time to take this more serious. I'm pretty sure I was just a walking shell of a person the rest of the day at work.
For dinner, I made broccoli and squash. I didn't hate it. I never really hated vegetables. I just prefer steak and potatoes. The next day I had an appointment for an Upper GI Swallow Test. That was probably the best thing after seeing my weight gain. No food or drink before the test. But was also going to be touch cause I am a late night binge eater. So, what else could I do? I went to bed at 7pm and didn't get up until my test the next morning. Call it depression, call it avoidance, call it scared. I just needed time to grieve because I was ashamed of how out of control my weight had become.
**totally forgot to include that I had an EKG at this appt and some listening to my heart. I think I got flustered discussing my pounds that I forgot. It's important that I log all my steps. Doc ordered an echo and a cpap appt. Plus side: even though my BP is high he would still clear me for surgery. Small victories.
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